Living the Golden Rule: Loving Others with Wisdom and Discernment

Summary

Jesus’ golden rule calls believers to love others with intentional, outward-focused care. This high standard requires awareness, wisdom, and discernment, since we cannot meet every need. True love listens before acting and avoids assuming others want what we want. When God’s love motivates self-sacrifice guided by wisdom, the golden rule becomes a powerful force for good. If widely practiced, it would transform relationships and reflect heaven on earth.

Jesus’ Simple but Radical Command

Jesus said, “Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets” (Matthew 7:12 NLT). We know it as the golden rule.

In other words, we must not cling to a navel-gazing world where only our needs matter. We must treat others as well as we treat ourselves (Matthew 22:37-39) and diligently meet their needs.

Why Loving Others Is Hard for Everyone

The golden rule love lesson sets a high standard. I am the first to admit I often don’t clear that bar. I am fairly certain you don’t either!

Seeing Needs Requires Intentional Awareness

If we aren’t concerned about others’ needs, we probably won’t even see those needs. The challenge is to see what we have often ignored in the past. Once seen, we need wisdom. What needs can we meet? How should we meet them?

Wisdom Is Needed to Help Well

We can’t meet the needs of eight billion people. Discernment is necessary.

For example, in response to a Facebook automatic response, “Please let us know how we can help you,” I receive more than 350 requests for money annually from strangers. I say no to them all as follows: “I am sorry, but my ministry is providing free spiritual resources for Christians.”

I refer them to my website, https://www.christiangrowthresources.com. I love best when God’s love flows through my spiritual gift of writing. My website is my best gift to others.

Listening Before Assuming What Others Need

Nicholas Graham wrote, “The problem with the golden rule is … everyone has different values and interests… For this reason, the ‘golden rule’ shouldn’t be about what you would want done for yourself—— rather, it should be … listen to others before you assume they want what you want!” To answer the question, if everyone treated each other like they’d like to be treated, I imagine the world would be pretty similar to the way it currently is—— chaotic and seemingly self-centered.”1

His point about listening to others before assuming they want what we do has merit. For example, I once did nothing when I could have helped someone pick up spilled items in a grocery store. I felt guilty about doing nothing and believed I should have helped pick up the items.

Based on his insight, I should have asked, “May I help you pick up”? I should not assume people want what I do.

On the other hand, his conclusion that the world would be unchanged if everyone followed the golden rule couldn’t be more wrong. If everyone lived to be a blessing, if everyone’s eyes turned toward others’ needs and how to meet them, how does he conclude the world would be “seemingly self-centered”?

Why Living the Golden Rule Would Change the World

As Dr. Weirich, my botany professor, once said to a student’s answer to his question, “That is exactly wrong!” If everyone followed the golden rule, earthly life would be heavenly.

The golden rule is a valuable guideline for outward-looking, love-motivated living. God’s love requires self-sacrifice to benefit others.

What we want done for us in the same circumstances helps us decide how to help others. We must temper our preferences with information about others’ needs and desires.

1.     Nicholas Graham, Adjunct Professor at Mount St. Mary’s University. How would the world change if everyone followed the golden rule? - Quora

Photo: Image Creator (microsoft.com)